Dirty Dessert: A Second Helpings Short Story Read online

I swallow the tears inside my throat. “My life let me down. I wanted a completely new one.” I wrap my fingers around the bars. “After you left, I was going to church a lot. I was looking for—”

  “Comfort after I broke your heart.” He runs a hand over his short hair. “I’m so sorry, Leah. Hurting you was the last thing I ever wanted to do.”

  I shrug. “What’s done is done.” It’s hard for me to relive the memories of those painful days following his departure from my life, having to tell everyone there will be no wedding. I was the talk of the town for months. The convent offered me a hiding place, a fresh—though unconventional—start.

  We stare at each other for a long time, ignoring the other cellmates, unspoken words hanging in the air between us. As I drown in his sad eyes, I remember why he said he did it. “Are you safe now?” It would break my heart to know a serial killer is after him. “You’re no longer in danger or anything?”

  I keep my voice low. I have no idea if it’s safe for us to discuss the topic of his witness protection. When they took our belongings, I saw the fake ID that had helped Ernest live a new life. Both of us had been living completely different lives.

  He nods. “The killer was captured a year ago. He’s behind bars.”

  First I feel relief, then an invisible sword slices through my heart. “A year ago?” Without meaning to, I sink to the floor, my back against the bars. “You waited a year to come back?” My voice is a croak inside my throat.

  In his cell I feel him lowering himself to my level. “Baby, I wanted to come back as soon as it was over. I swear to you, I did.” His voice is hoarse with emotion.

  “But you didn’t.” I don’t even understand why I feel betrayed all over again. But the reality is, if he loves me as much as he says he does, he would have come back as soon as he was free to walk away from his fake life. It would have been nice to know he grabbed the first opportunity to get back to me. Would I have been ready to walk away from the convent though? Am I ready to walk away now?

  The silence that stretches between us is not even disturbed by the sounds of other inmates whispering, someone coughing, and another crying. It wraps itself around the two of us like a suffocating cocoon.

  “I can explain.” He pauses. “A few months before, I was diagnosed with liver cancer.”

  Before my heart completely shatters, a flurry of activity yanks us back to the moment.

  A guard with keys jangling at his waist comes to stand at the entrance of Ernest’s cell and unlocks it. “Ernest Ressler, you’re free to go.” The guard lets him out and approaches the female cell. “You too... Sister—”

  “Leah,” I whisper. It feels wrong to call myself a sister after the sin I have committed.

  I drag myself to my feet, Ernest’s words still ringing in my ears, wrapping themselves around my heart, squeezing hard. Cancer? My vision is a blur as we’re escorted to the front of the jail, where Ernest’s father is waiting.

  After all these years, I’m still taken aback by just how much Don Ressler resembles his son.

  “Next time, get a room.” His voice is stern, but his disappointment is trumped by his love for Ernest. He must be so relieved to have him back. I wonder if he knew about the witness protection. I wouldn’t be surprised as he was a cop at the time. But does he know about the cancer?

  After we get our belongings, the two men hug for a long time.

  “Thanks,” I say, clutching the head-covering Ernest had removed from my head in the car. “Thanks for—”

  “Come here.” Don opens his arms for me to walk into. “I missed you, sweet girl.” As I allow him to pull me into a hug, I blink back tears. He had been like a father to me, and I had been so excited to be his daughter-in-law.

  Someone clears their throat and Don releases me. We turn to find Sister Anna standing next to Ernest. She came after all. I thought she would be too humiliated on my behalf to show up.

  My heart clenched tight inside my chest, I approach her. Before I can speak, she raises a hand and pulls me aside.

  “Why did you do it?” she asks, her eyes avoiding mine.

  “I—I don’t know.” A wave of humiliation sweeps through my body. It forces me to hang my head in shame.

  “I do.” She touches my arm and I look up at her. Her eyes are on my face now. “I knew from the start that you were not meant to be a nun. It was not your calling. You chose the path for the wrong reasons. You were too blinded by pain at the time to make the right choice.”

  I part my lips to speak, but I can’t find the words to tell her she’s wrong. Now I understand why I never got the feeling that she had fully accepted me. I always felt a little uncomfortable around her.

  I clear my throat. “I’m sorry.”

  “What you did is wrong, but it’s not me you should be asking for forgiveness.” She pauses. “And after what happened, I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to—”

  “I understand,” I say quickly and glance at Ernest, whose eyes are on us. “You’re right. I chose the wrong path. I was not meant to be a nun.” Since I’m only a novice, I’m free to quit the novitiate at any time. “I won’t return.”

  Don slings an arm around my shoulders and pulls me close as we walk out of the building. “You’re staying with us,” he says, “for as long as you like.”

  “I—” Whatever I wanted to say dies on my lips. The truth is, with my mom out of town and the convent closed to me, I have no place to go. I don’t even have money to pay for a motel room. So, I swallow my pride and humiliation and look up at him with tears in my eyes. “Thank you, Don.” I bite my lip. “But I won’t stay too long.” Tomorrow I will start putting back together the pieces of my life.

  One night, one moment of blind passion, and everything has changed. How could I have been so careless? But what’s done is done. Even if I wanted to go back, I can’t. I’m just glad Don was able to pull some strings to get us released from jail. A night in jail would have been devastating.

  In the backseat of Don’s car, Ernest reaches for my hand and holds it. I don’t pull away. I’m incapable of keeping a distance from him.

  Before starting the car, Don throws a glance at us. “Let’s never talk about this.”

  “I agree,” Ernest says, smiling at me.

  “Good.” Don starts the car. “Now let’s go and enjoy what’s left of Thanksgiving dinner. It’s great to have you both back.”

  I don’t say anything during the short drive to the brick stone house that had once felt like home. I’m not sure how much Ernest has told his father about his disappearance or the cancer. But the knot in the pit of my stomach won’t release until I speak to him again.

  When we enter the house, Justine—Ernest’s mother—pulls both me and Ernest into her arms. She’s so overcome with emotion she hardly says a word. She finally releases us and busies herself with settling us at the table and feeding us butternut squash soup, roast turkey, mashed potatoes with sausage gravy, and other traditional Thanksgiving dishes.

  During the meal, while Don and Justine pretend we never left, Ernest and I are unable to keep our eyes off each other. As I eat my food, I count the minutes until we can be alone to talk, to figure out where we will go from here.

  It’s a whole hour until we are alone at the table, while Justine and Don fetch the dessert.

  “I’ll be right back.” Ernest pushes himself up from his chair and disappears from the dining room before I can insist we talk. I wonder what he’s up to. He had been disappearing every few minutes during dinner. He returns only five minutes later.

  “Come with me.” He stretches out his hand.

  I allow him to pull me out of my chair. I feel strangely light in jeans and a plain, white T-shirt, instead of a habit. The clothes on my body belong to Ernest’s sister, Marybeth, a hotshot lawyer in New York. She couldn’t make it to Thanksgiving because of work.

  “Where are we going?” I ask as we step onto the porch.

  “Somewhere we can talk in private. Co
me on.”

  He leads me down a small path to the garden shed that’s so big, it’s almost like a room. It used to be our favorite place when we wanted to be alone.

  I shake my head in wonder. “I can’t believe I’m seeing this again.”

  Ernest lays a hand on the small of my back and pushes open the door. “Welcome home.”

  When I see what’s inside, my mouth drops. There are candles everywhere and red rose petals sprinkled on a picnic blanket on the floor.

  “When... How—”

  “It doesn’t matter.” He ushers me inside, and we lower ourselves to the ground. Then he places a hand on my cheek. “I’m so sorry for everything... including what happened tonight.”

  “Tonight was both our decisions.” I place a hand on top of his. “I only want to know one thing. Is the cancer gone? Are you healthy?” I can’t bear the thought of losing him just when I found him again.

  “I was misdiagnosed.” He inhales sharply. “I found out six months after I started receiving chemotherapy. As soon as I got my strength and hair back, I came back to you.”

  “Oh my God.” My fingertips go to my trembling lips, then I pull him into my arms. “I’m so sorry.”

  He pulls away and wipes away my tears. “Let’s forget everything that happened and start over. What do you think?”

  “But where do we start?” I purse my lips, tasting my tears.

  “Right here. I still love you, and I think you still love me.” He reaches for a red lunchbox I didn’t see before. With a naughty grin on his face, he snaps it open to reveal a cheesecake cupcake topped with blueberries.

  Air whooshes from my lungs as my mind takes me back to the day he had proposed right here in this shed—at Thanksgiving three years ago—with the same kind of cupcake. We’re three years older and we’re bruised, but everything feels exactly the same.

  “What are you up to?” I stifle a giggle. I don’t know why I even asked that question. I already know the answer.

  He shrugs. “Just turning back the hands of time.” He lifts the cupcake to reveal a stunning emerald diamond ring. Then he picks it up and reaches for my hand. “I want you back, Leah. I still want to marry you. If you say yes, I promise to show up at the wedding.”

  As he slides the ring onto my finger, joy bubbles up inside my chest. I don’t need to say yes because he already knows. “I love you,” I say instead.

  He pulls me into his arms and we create our own special kind of dessert. But before we get dirty on the picnic blanket, we make sure the door is locked.

  As promised, he showed up for our happy day. After many twists and turns, we are now husband and wife.

  The elevator doors of the Starlight Hotel yawn open and we exit, giggling like teenagers.

  When we come the door of the honeymoon suite, my husband opens the door, then sweeps me off my feet. He lowers his lips to mine and I gladly drown in his kiss. His tongue tastes of our blueberry wedding cake and his breath is wrapped in the aroma of champagne.

  Our wedding was small, with only thirty guests, but it was everything we could have hoped for. We came so close to losing each other that we decided to marry within two months of our engagement. Between me reopening my flower shop and Ernest working as a paramedic, we had fun planning our wedding.

  Ernest breaks our kiss and walks through the door. In the candlelit suite, he lowers me onto the petal-covered bed and photographs me with his eyes. “Today was hard,” he says, coming to lie next to me.

  “Hard?” I raise an eyebrow. “Our wedding day was hard for you to get through?”

  He chuckles. “Not in the way you think. I mean, it was damn hard because I kept imagining you without your clothes on. I couldn’t wait to take this dress off.” He sweeps a hand across the crystal-encrusted bust of my wedding gown.

  “Well, you’ll have to wait, mister. Let’s give each other our gifts first.”

  He tries to keep me on the bed, but I release myself and dig into my suitcase. He groans and reaches into the inner pocket of his jacket, removing a square, velvet box.

  “Ladies first.” He hands me the box.

  My heart fluttering with excitement, I unwrap my present and gasp when I see what he bought me. “Ernest, where did you find this?” I touch the silver angel-wing bangle bracelet with diamonds on the two fragile wings.

  “I didn’t. I had it made for you. I know how much you loved the bracelet your grandmother left you. You were so upset when it got lost in high school. I sent a picture of you wearing it to a jeweler in New York and he created this masterpiece.”

  I take a closer look. “Wow. It looks so similar.” I throw myself into his arms. “I love you so much, baby. Thank you.”

  We kiss deeply, then he pulls away and rubs his hands together. “Now give me my present.”

  I hand him the rectangular box and watch as his eyes widen the moment he sees what’s inside. “Are you serious?” Ernest lifts the positive pregnancy test from the box.

  “I couldn’t think of a better present.” I lay a hand on my belly.

  “A baby? This is the best.” First he kisses my face, then moves to my stomach, pretending to listen. “I can’t believe we’re having a baby.”

  “No, daddy.” I cup his face with both hands as he comes up for another kiss. “You’ll be the father of twins.”

  “You’re not serious?” He freezes.

  “I am. We’re having twins. Please don’t freak out on me.” When the doctor told me the news, I was worried about how Ernest would react.

  “Are you kidding?” He slides off the bed and pulls me to my feet and into his arms. “I’m thrilled. I’ll have more of you to love.” He shakes his head in wonder. “Mrs. Ressler, today, you’ve made me the happiest man many times over.”

  I beam up at him. “And I promise to give you many more days like this.”

  We hold on to each other for a long time, then he reaches behind me and starts to tug at the pearl buttons of my dress. “I guess this calls for a celebration.”

  “I guess it does, Mr. Ressler,” I say, and make love to my husband.

  Not too long ago I was a nun, determined to live a life without a man. Now here I am, excited about a future with the love of my life. As much as I loved the peace and security I found in the church, I prefer this life so much better, a life with Ernest and our babies.

  THE END

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