Wedding Wishes (Wedding Season Series) Read online

  It’s the last thing I want to do, but what choice do I have?

  “Can I sleep on it and give you a call in the morning?”

  “Sure,” he says. “I’ll be waiting.”

  With Justin in my life, it’s hard for me to make most decisions on a whim and I hate leaving him. I could take him with me, but I’d hate for Caleb to reject him in person.

  No. I have to do this alone.

  The next person I call is Cindy, who immediately offers to look after Justin. Since she’s taken care of him in the past, I accept the offer.

  “I’ll only spend a day there.”

  “Stay the entire weekend if you like,” she says, hopeful. “Justin will be fine with me.”

  After giving Justin a bath and tucking him in, I tell him my plans, expecting him to reject the idea. But to my surprise, he gives me a smile.

  Before I leave the room, he calls out to me. “Thank you, mom.”

  CALEB

  “Mr. Caleb,” Larissa, our long-time housekeeper in Cabo San Lucas, calls from the door. “Can I clean the room now?” She’s a very determined little old woman.

  I’ve been in Cabo for four days and barely left the room, wrestling with my demons. It doesn’t matter how many times I asked to be left alone, Larissa kept coming back. But I have not been ready to step out into the world yet.

  I have neglected everything, including my business. It’s a great thing that I have the best staff, who are perfectly capable of keeping my business afloat in my absence.

  The press has been having a field day, dissecting my life piece by piece, disrespecting my privacy. I don’t give a damn what they write about me. They can write all the shit they want, as long as they stay the fuck away from Ellie. She deserves to lead a normal life. My people have been working behind the scenes trying to shield her.

  “All right, Larissa,” I say, throwing my hands in the air in defeat. “The room is all yours.”

  My head feels like it’s not even attached to my body as I get up from the bed. “I’ll go out for a walk. I’ll be back in thirty minutes.” Hopefully it would be sufficient time for her to clean up the mess I made.

  “Very good.” Larissa’s face brightens. “But Mr. Caleb, you should eat. You have lost too much weight. I cook you a nice breakfast when I’m done, okay?”

  I wave a dismissive hand. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll order something.” I could always hire a chef to do the cooking, but right now I need as few people in my life as possible.

  Larissa wags a finger at me. “Restaurant food is not good for you. You need a good, home-cooked meal.”

  Not for the first time, I regret asking her to remain at the house while I’m here. She’s been acting more like a grandmother than a housekeeper. On one hand, it’s nice to know someone cares, but on the other, it gets on my nerves.

  “Thanks, Larissa. I’ll be back soon.” I walk out of the room still dressed in the t-shirt and shorts I slept in.

  The sun assaults my eyes as I make my way to the private beach that’s only a stone’s throw from the LaClaire villa. After spending several days indoors, bright light is no friend of mine.

  The moment my feet sink into the soft sand, guilt stabs my heart. I was going to marry Ellie right here on this beach.

  The first time I brought her to Cabo, she fell in love with the place. Every year after that, I invited her to the yearly LaClaire family reunions and she gladly accepted. I hate that she will never come here again.

  I miss her so damn much. I dialed her number several times, but always hung up before the phone started to ring. And when she called, I was too much of a coward to answer. Hearing the pain in her voice would break me.

  She will never forgive me for leaving the way I did. I will never forgive myself for being a jerk.

  I run along the empty beach for longer than half an hour. When I return to the villa, I find my room completely transformed. The bed has been made, and there are no pieces of garbage or socks on the floor. Even the air smells as though it had been scrubbed with a citrus-scented cleaner.

  I inhale deeply as I watch the sheer white curtains flutter in the wind that floods the room through the open windows.

  Five minutes after I enter the room, Larissa appears to let me know that breakfast is ready. I’m allowed to enjoy it only in the dining room. Since I got to Cabo, I’ve been eating all my meals in the room. Larissa is clearly determined to keep me from becoming a recluse again. Since she’s gone to so much trouble, I don’t let her down. I jump into the shower, change into fresh clothes, then head back downstairs.

  She was right. The simple home-cooked meal—of omelet, bacon, toast, and freshly pressed juice—is what I needed to feel close to normal again.

  Once I’m done, I decide to do one thing on my to-do list.

  Before pain drowns me again and alcohol clouds my mind, I give my financial advisor a call to discuss the educational fund I want to open up for Justin. He may not be my son, but he left an indelible mark on my heart, him and his mother.

  Five minutes into the conversation, I hear a loud sound. Not long after, through the large windows, I notice a plane landing on the distant airfield on the property. I end the call immediately, my heart racing. My brothers have come to give me hell. What the fuck happened to them respecting my privacy?

  I’m fuming as I watch two people emerge from the plane. I cannot make out their faces until they have neared the house. As soon as their faces come into focus, my heart stills inside my chest. Shit. It’s Ellie and Lance. She’s here for answers and I’m not sure I’m ready to give them to her.

  I’m a coward. I left Ellie without a proper goodbye because I was not man enough to face the pain in her eyes, the same gorgeous eyes which are now looking back at me from the doorway. Hurt. Disappointed. Confused. Devoid of light. I hate that I’m responsible for the dark circles around her eyes.

  But even in a broken state, her beauty takes my breath away. Her skin is clean of makeup, her black hair in a messy bun on top of her head. She might think she looks a mess, but all I can think as I watch her is that I want to kiss her again.

  “You have a lot of explaining to do,” Lance barks because Ellie is not able to say a word.

  “I know,” I say, my gaze still on Ellie’s face. “I need to speak to Ellie first.”

  “I think that’s a good idea,” Lance says. “Then you’ll have to answer to me.”

  I can’t focus on anyone else right now, not when she’s standing before me, looking as broken as I feel.

  I’ve tried hard to avoid her, but now she’s here and I can’t run any longer. I can’t hide. I need to be a man. It’s over between us. That’s not going to change, but she does deserve to know the truth.

  Without a word, I take her hand and lead her upstairs to my room. She says nothing until we enter the room, then she suddenly turns on me, her eyes on fire.

  “You bastard,” she says, her lips trembling. “You led me on. You said you loved me. You lied.”

  “I didn’t lie.” I step closer to her, unable to stay away, desperate to be enveloped by her scent. “I meant every word.” Without thinking, I pull her to me.

  What I’m doing is fucked up. She wants to talk and I want to make love to her. That’s all I could think about since the day I walked out on her. Now that she’s here, I can’t resist her. I’m powerless in her presence. My mind is completely driven by lust at this point.

  “What do you think you’re doing?” She takes a step back and folds her arms across her chest.

  I press a fist to my forehead, then drop my hand again. “I’m sorry. I got carried away. It’s just that I miss you so much, Ellie.” I come near her again. “I just...I need to touch you again.”

  “How can you even say that?” Her eyes flash with anger. “You hurt me, Caleb. You hurt us.” She starts to cry then, her small shoulders quaking as she walks over to the bed.

  I can’t keep myself away anymore. I have to fix what I broke the best way I ca
n. I cross the room and sit next to her, drawing her to me. At first, she puts up a fight, but her sobs soon rob her of strength and I feel her body leaning into me. She wants me as much as I want her.

  I manage to keep my hard dick in check, until she looks up at me with wet eyes and brings her lips close to mine. We don’t speak, not in words, not yet at least. I know it’s coming. Her anger will return. But for now, it feels like the old times. Her lips feel as though they have never parted with mine.

  She doesn’t stop me when I lean her onto the bed, grateful that Larissa made it.

  When my hand slips into her yellow satin blouse, she moans from deep within her throat. This will be the last time I’ll hold her in my arms. It has to be. So I relish every moment, every kiss, every touch.

  My tongue is alive, dancing with hers, tasting something sweet in her mouth.

  First, she kisses me back, her tongue welcoming mine, then she plants her palms on my chest and shoves me away. “What am I doing?” She presses her fingertips to her eyes. “You’re not mine anymore. You belong to someone else now. You didn’t even waste any time at all.”

  Her words hit me like bricks being thrown at me one after the other.

  “I what?” I roll off her, but continue to gaze into her damp eyes, confused. “What are you talking about, Ellie?”

  “Don’t pretend you don’t know.” She sniffs. “It was all over the papers, you and Beverley in bed together. You have moved on with her.” She detaches herself from me and gets to her feet, smoothing down her blouse and skirt. “I didn’t come here to beg you to return to me, Caleb. If you don’t want me, I don’t—”

  “Don’t.” I rise to my feet as well and close the distance between us. My arm wraps around her waist. She tries to pull away, but I don’t let her. “I’m not dating anyone. I don’t want anyone else, Ellie.”

  She tries to speak again, but my lips capture hers in a hungry kiss that swallows her words. It takes a while for her to let go of her anger and melt into my arms again, but finally she does, holding on tight. She doesn’t want to let go. I don’t want to let go. This is the closure we both need.

  We make love. It’s beautiful, but it’s also excruciating because I know it’s the last time I’ll ever hold her in my arms again.

  First, I honor her body, taking my time to caress the full breasts, twirling my wet tongue around the hard nipples while she shivers underneath me.

  My fingers dance across her skin, feeling, remembering, switching on every part of her. I keep going until they reach her core and slide inside to explore her warmth. She feels like home.

  She lets out a moan after each finger I slip inside. One. Two. Three. Then I can’t take it anymore. My dick is begging for release. I’m all too happy to oblige.

  Ellie welcomes me with open arms, wrapping me in her warm scent that reminds me of ripe peaches.

  The fight has completely gone out of her and something stronger has taken over, a magic only we can create.

  Around my shaft, she feels even better than I remember, her tunnel warm and sleek with juices that make the journey so much more fun for both of us.

  “I missed you so damn much,” I say, curling my fingers around her firm buttocks, pulling them farther apart so I can slide in deeper.

  She only moans louder in response. She wants me, but she doesn’t trust me, not after what I did to her. I don’t blame her.

  I take my time to heal some of her pain. Then she gets louder and I go faster. I piston into her harder until both our bodies are drenched. I forget how to breathe, but I don’t stop. I keep going, racing toward my reward while she clenches tighter and tighter around me.

  Eventually, my hips meet hers in an explosion that almost blinds me and brings Ellie to tears.

  “What does this mean?” she asks when it’s over, and we’re lying in each other’s arms. Her words are drowned in tears. She senses that nothing has changed, that this is goodbye. “Are we still over?”

  I hesitate before nodding my aching head. “I’m sorry.”

  She pushes herself out of bed, taking the sheets with her. I watch her move to the window. She just stands there, looking out at the ocean the way she used to do every time we visited Cabo. Then she speaks and we’re back in the painful moment.

  “Why are you doing this to me? Why did you even ask me to marry you? Why did you have to break up with me three months before our wedding? Do you have any idea how cruel that is?” She turns to pin me with a gaze. “When people ask me what happened, I stand there like a fool because I don’t know.”

  The moment of truth has arrived. I have to tell her. There’s no other way out. The thought of her hating me forever, thinking I discarded her like an old car, makes my chest hurt. In fact, my whole body is hurting and exhausted. Without her in my life, pain is my constant companion, both physical and emotional.

  “I’m sorry, baby, but I had to let you go. I love you and I love Justin, but I didn’t have a choice.”

  She lets out a low laugh and wraps her arms around her body, holding the white sheet in place. “That’s nonsense. We always have a choice in life. You chose a life without me. You decided I’m not enough for you.” I watch as her shoulders cave in. “But I understand. Me and my son are a burden. But it would have been nice to know three years ago that you’re not in our lives to stay.”

  “Never.” I stand and go to her. I cradle her face between my hands, bringing my forehead to hers. “You were never a burden to me. I’m the burden.”

  She pulls back and narrows her eyes at me. “What are you talking about?”

  I back away and sink back onto the bed, my head in my hands, my eyes hot. “I’m sick, Ellie. Pancreatic cancer. Stage three.” I try to say more, but the words seem to be stuck in my throat. When she doesn’t respond for a long time and the tension becomes too unbearable, I look up.

  She’s sitting on the floor now, her back leaned against the glass window, her eyes fixed on me. “No,” she whispers. “Tell me it’s not true. Tell me you’re not going to die.”

  I shake my head. “I wish I could, but I can’t.”

  ELLIE

  My heart is breaking all over again. I don’t want to believe what Caleb just told me, but he insists it’s the truth. My first reaction after the numbness is to lunge for him, to pummel his chest over and over again while he tries to get hold of my hands. I don’t make it easy for him.

  “How dare you,” I say between sobs.

  “Baby, stop.” He finally gets hold of my hands and brings them together in front of him, pressing his warm lips to my knuckles. “Please stop.”

  I shake my head. “Why didn’t you tell me?” I look up into his eyes, but his features are distorted by my tears.

  “Because I didn’t want you to worry about me. You have enough on your plate.” His Adam’s apple rises then falls. “I didn’t want to take your attention from Justin. He needs you more than I do.”

  “Don’t do that. Don’t use my son as an excuse.” I pull away from him, squeezing my eyes shut, tears spilling onto my cheeks. “How could you doubt my love for you? Do you really think I cannot handle this? I have walked through hell before. I’m familiar with the heat of the flames. I’ve been burned and scarred, and I’m still standing.”

  He rubs the back of his neck vigorously. “I know you can handle it, but—”

  “No, you don’t.” I swipe the tears from my cheek with the back of my hand. “I love you, Caleb. I love you more than I have ever loved any man. I love you so much that I would walk through fire with you. But you doubted me.” Even though I said all those things to him, the real truth is, I don’t know how I will be able to handle the reality that I might lose him, not to another woman, but to death. But there’s no time to be weak. I have to be strong enough to be there for him. Caleb needs me.

  The pain in his eyes is so raw that crushing guilt rushes through me. I didn’t react in the right way. I should have been more understanding, less angry.

  “I�
��m sorry,” I say, walking up to him, wrapping my arms around his neck, holding him as best I can, doing my best to stop both of us from coming undone. “I’m so sorry.”

  After we stand in each other’s arms for what feels like hours, I lead him back to the bed, sit him down, then I draw in a breath for courage.

  “Tell me everything,” I whisper. I hate to torture him, to make him speak of something he’s clearly trying to ignore. But in order to be able to help him, I need to know more. “Is it treatable?”

  He takes my hands in his, holding them to his chest. “There are a few options, surgery, chemo.” He pauses. “But I don’t want to do any of them.”

  “What do you mean you don’t want to do any of them?” As much as I’m trying to control my emotions, I’m finding it hard to keep my voice from rising. “You don’t want to undergo treatment?”

  He releases my hands and nods. “I had an aunt who died of cancer, my mother’s sister. She did everything the doctors asked her to do. The treatments she underwent were so brutal that in the end, she was nothing but a shadow of herself.”

  “I’m sorry,” I murmur. “But, Caleb, if there’s any chance at all that you might survive this, wouldn’t you want to try?”

  “I don’t have much time left. The doctors said I have only a couple of months left. I don’t want to spend the last months of my life in and out of hospitals.”

  “You might still end up there due to complications brought on by your illness. You could contract something else that worsens the symptoms.” I’m beside myself with anger at this point. I’m not so much angry at him, but at the situation.

  Helpless as to what I can do, I slide to my knees in front of him and rest my head on his lap, my arms around his legs, my tears soaking him. “Please, baby, don’t do this.” An ache spreads through my chest. “Don’t just give up. You won’t have to do it alone. I’m here.”